Strangefellows’s owner and bartender was a thin pale streak of misery who only wore black because no-one had come up with a darker colour yet.

What am I going to do with all these bodies?” Said Jimmy, just a bit plaintively.“I can’t keep them, I don’t have the cupboard space.

She might not have the same survival instincts as us.’ ‘It’s amazing,’ said Jeeves. ‘You keep talking and you keep coming up with things, and yet not one of them is ever remotely comforting.’ ‘It’s a gift,’ I said.

Oh come on!” I said. “If Walker couldn’t control me with his Voice, did you really think you stood any chance? I’ve been around. I’ve stepped on worse things than you! I’ve faced angels, from Above and Below! I don’t bow down to anyone! I’m John Taylor!

Sometimes you do things to yourself so bad that the memories have barbs and never let you go.

The cream-tiled walls were spattered here and there with old dried bloodstains, deep gouges that might have been clawmarks, and all kinds of graffiti. As usual, someone had spelt Cthulhu wrongly.

Big corporations aren’t always the bad guys; but it’s the sensible way to bet.

Never go anywhere without condiments. Condiments are our friends.

Remember, the way to a vampire’s heart is straight under the sternum, and then lean in hard.’ I.

Don’t you dare try to out-gloom me. I’m the only one here entitled to indulge in deep dark existential brooding.